Google satellite

I did something rather simple but profound yesterday. After looking at the google satellite maps of the Palm Islands in Dubai (I saw the construction project documented on the National Geographic channel), I had a sudden idea.

I typed in the name of the city where I was born. Then, based on childhood recollections, I followed streets in "hybrid" mode, literally walking (or panning) street by street, house by house, to find my old elementary school, the park where I played and swam, the house where I lived, my friends' houses, the little triangle grassy area where three roads met and we kids used to meet or hang out, and so on.

I wasn't too nostalgic about the whole thing, but it was intriguing and interesting. In theory, I'll never have any reason or need to go back to my birthplace (it's far and there's nothing there), but it is pretty darn cool to "revisit" and check it out from above. Highly recommended.

Flavour of Love continues

Actually, I had predicted Bootz would win before she did that stupid "I'm a celibate" self destruction.

I still say that Flav won't pick Krazee, but he won't pick New York either, so I guess that leaves the only man in the game, Deelishis. I can't fathom that. I bet the show is slanted toward making Krazee look bad because he'll choose her. She's the most quote-unquote attractive of the remainder, but she won't work out. So sad.

This Sunday, looks like New York's mother meets with Flav again, and the daughter freaks out. Again. I can't frigging wait!

W. Bush and war crimes

I think Bush should come to task for these secret prisons. Torture is not only ineffective and inefficient, it is immoral. I don't care if they are terrorists with valuable information. Lock them up and let them take the information to the grave. You say they have information on future attacks? How about beefing up security in meaningful ways other than banning yoghurt and lipsticks?

Of course, Bush, Cheney, Rumsfeld, and everyone in the CIA will claim that we are at war. Or that it was all legal. I think a great many people will disagree. But if we are at war, then there is still procedure and rule of law. And there are consequences even when at war: war crimes tribunals and crimes against humanity. Saddam is having his day in court, so should the Bush White House.

I am a dyed-in-the-wool republican. I voted for George W. Bush in 2000. It pained me to vote for Kerry in 2004. I hope and wish that the next president will investigate and try George W. Bush, Dick Cheney, and Donald Rumsfeld for war crimes. I may be forced to vote Democratic once again to achieve these goals.

Hopefully he won't pull an O.J. Simpson. Or a Michael Jackson. Or a Blake...

They killed Lazarus!

I was recently watching The Last Temptation of Christ, which is not a terrific movie despite the talents of Willem Dafoe, Harvey Keitel and Martin Scorsese. I hadn't watched the whole thing before now, so it was a fair amount of entertainment. I absolutely loved the soundtrack by Peter Gabriel, by the way, and I still do.

I was laughing so hard at one point, however, I couldn't believe it wasn't a comedy. First of all, I understand that this movie amounts to heresy for most Christians. Well, I say Fuck all the Christians, including G.W. Bush. But second, portraying Jesus as a somewhat hesitant, surprised god-in-training wasn't very convincing despite Dafoe's genius acting.

However, the scene where Jesus raises Lazarus was pretty cool and neat. Lazaurs rises, and his hand is grotesque and white, skin falling off, and covered in bandages. It was a neat scene. A couple days later, we see Saul (who is in cahoots with Judas) talking with Lazarus.

In a reprisal of his role in Apocalypse Now, Saul asks Lazarus about dying, "What was it like?"

Lazarus says some stupid shit, then, Saul pulls out a knife. He holds it for a second, then, stabs Lazarus. Lazarus falls down dead, and Saul and his two buddies trot off into the desert.

That shit was extremely funny. I don't remember reading that in the Bible. Poor bastard Lazarus dies, raises from the dead, and then is killed! That's awesome. If you're going to make a sacrilegious film, that's the proper way to do it.

Flavour of Love vs. New York

This is a spoiler if you love Flavour of Love as much as I do. The spoiler is that "New York is in the mother fucking house"!

While I was initially upset that she was brought back, and even more upset that she was allowed back into the house, I eventually calmed down. As stupid, neurotic, obsessed and psychotic as she is, she's actually one step up from all the whores currently available to Sir Flav.

1. Deelishis[sic] is, or was, a motherfucking man, and nothing you can say or do will convince me otherwise. Those transgender operations are so good, I hear, they can nearly fool a gynocologist. I will not be fooled.
2. Krazee[sic] is bound to be kicked out. I was highly suspicious of her early moves and crocodile tears of love. She got way too much early screen time and plot lines to be the final winner. There's no way that the show will be that obvious. Few people could see last season's Hoopz[sic] win
3. Speaking of which, Bootz[sic] seems like the one who will win. Although Krazee[sic] looks more like the Hoopz[sic] type, I believe Bootz[sic] seems sincere, if not crafty and manipulative.
4. New York did not win the first season, and she won't win the second! Although I still want to see her mother and that uncomfortable situation again. And again, and again...

As a semi-serious aside, I am posting about Flavour of Love, what could be considered one of the trashiest TV shows around, ever, on the fifth anniversary of September 11. That is my subtle "eff you" raised middle finger to the fucking terrorists and friends. There's another one for Bush et.al., too. And here's one for you if you complain!

Head on -- apply directly to your asshole!

You've seen the commercials if you're unfortunate enough to watch CNN or CNN headline news (which I do). It's a very simple product and catch phrase. They just repeat it three times in a row, three times, so that you don't forget:

"Head on, apply directly to the forehead. Head on, apply directly to the forehead. Head on, apply directly to the forehead."

Sure, I could come up with some kind of slimy salve, put it in a deodorant stick and sell it myself. But I wouldn't have been able to come up with that sickening phrase, and then repeat it until it become meaningless mumbo-jumbo.

And then, if that weren't enough, they have branched off into joint therapy:

"Activ-on, apply directly where it hurts. Activ-on, apply directly where it hurts. Activ-on, apply directly where it hurts."

I can't believe they sell head-on as activ-on, and use the same slogan. I think they can charge more for Activ-on because it can be used in more places than Head-on. Maybe they charge more for the Activ-on, because it's missing an "e". Clearly this is aimed at the 90+ crowd, right? The crowd that watches QVC -- the crowd that trusted Dan Rather because he was "one of them".

But then, I started to wonder, you know, what if you mixed up the Head-on and Activ-on in your bathroom cabinet.

"Head-on, apply directly where it hurts. Or is it directly to the forehead? I can't recall. Activ-on goes directly where it hurts. But my head hurts. So can I use Activ-on there? My hemorrhoids have been acting up too, I think I can use Activ-on there! Clearly, you wouldn't use Head-on on your hemorrhoids!"

You thought that was a joke, right? I did too, but if you wait 15 seconds another commercial pops up exclaiming,

"Freedom from hemorrhoids? FREEdHEM! Freedom from hemorrhoids? FREEdHEM! Freedom from hemorrhoids? FREEdHEM!"

Oh.

My.

God.

"FREEdHEM, apply directly to your asshole! FREEdHem, freedom from head apply. Activ-on, apply directly to your forehead. Head-on, apply directly to your head. But not after you apply it to your ass. Remember, head first, ass second."

Coming soon,

"Vagidildo, apply directly to your cunt! Vagidildo, apply directly to your cunt! Vagidildo, apply directly to your cunt!"