Flavour flav!

I must admit that television is a horrible wasteland of vile and filthy denizens. At times, however, there is something so repulsive and sickening that one must watch it at all costs. I am referring to the Flavour Flav character on VH1. If you haven't seen what I'm talking about, then you will just have to count yourself as lucky and proceed onward. Do not peer into the murky depths provided here. It will not benefit yourself or anyone you know.

I watched two episodes of this disgusting mess and I admit it was "flavourful". The show is repulsive and offensive. The man himself is a vile beast worse than some golem creature from Lord of the Rings. The ho's and bitches are ugly, purile, juvenile, and borderline nut cases. But the show commands your attention like no other bewitching drug. I actually fear that I may purposefully turn to this show and watch it to the season climax. I fear that I may actually start to have withdrawal pains when the season ends.

I am seriously considering turning to heroin or methamphetamines to distract me. I think that these substitutes will be less harmful to me in the long run. That is, if I am hooked on some drugs I might become a life-long addict and die in a gutter somewhere. However, that would be preferable to being hooked on this TV show because when it ends, I will still be alive and wandering the channels in the middle of the cold, long nights in search of the next fix, muttering "I'm sick... you got any hits? No, it's only Friends. *click* Hey man, you got any score... no that's the news. *click* Help me out, bro, I'm scroungin' here. No, that's only Access Hollywood."

Oh, the humanity.